Fresh Paint
Sunday, October 10, 2004
Wisconsin Cats and Dogs
... and other observations from the notebook.

Strangest remark: "I'm not going to answer who I'm planning to vote for because it's unconstitutional and illegal."

Strangest other remark: "Well, I'm not going to vote for Kerry now that you've come to the door. My rule is that I don't vote for anyone who comes and asks me who I'm voting for." [ed. Bush supporters, please email me for this man's address].

Most lengthy guessing game:
"I'm not voting for Bush, I can tell you that right now."
Q. So you're voting for Kerry?
"He's not Bush, is he?"
Q. But are you voting for him?
"What did I just say?"
Q. So you're not voting for anyone?
"Of course I am."
Q. Are you voting for Nader?
Q. What about Feingold and Baldwin?
"Oh, sure, them."
Q. So you are voting for the Democrats.
"That's what the Union tells me... I've been retired from the Union since..." and the story goes on and on, until finally, laughing and laughing, "Of course I'm voting for Kerry. You think I'm nuts?"

WMDs found: It was a big football weekend in Beloit, the tradition being that houses of the seniors get TP'ed. All the neighborhood Kerry, Feingold, and Baldwin signs, plus a few Chuck Benedict signs, were stolen during the night and put at the corner house of a fiercely satanic (though outwardly suburban-looking) Bush supporter, lashed down with plastic wrap, and all their own Bush signs removed. "You should have been here at 7:30 this morning," she said. Yes, I wish I had been. "It took me forever to get rid of them. I had to take them all over to a dumpster." All you folks who complained to us that your signs went missing, now you know.

Cleanliness: Looking through the closed front doors of people not home, in number of cases, suspiciously large, I saw an upright vacuum cleaner or rug shampooer standing in the hallway, or just at the edge of the living room. A Saturday routine? Were the residents not home because they had been sucked into their appliances? Stay tuned for further developments.

Cats are for Kerry: I will describe a cat for you in detail, since I reluctantly decided it was rude to ask the canvassee whether I could take a picture of her cat. He was a pure white longhair, quite large (or else lots of hair) with the tail of a calico cat and calico markings on the head that looked like a little wig or perhaps a toupee set at a slightly jaunty angle. He came into the room as we were filling out an absentee ballot request, watched gravely, then nodded his approval and left.

Dogs are mostly undecided: They seem generally enthusiastic about everything, with the following exception: small, mean, brainless yappy dogs are for Bush, overwhelmingly.

And that's about it for this week. Heard about a few dirty tricks being played too. May have more to say about it later.

Have a pleasant fall afternoon. Around here it's beautiful outdoors, so of course I'm typing these words indoors.

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